Buying our Wedding Rings

My experience looking for wedding bands was very different than Mr. Pashmina’s. I knew what I wanted. In one word: Sparkles! My question was how to get it–with it being the most comfortable & at a good price. I never knew how girly and glamorous I could feel wearing a ring until Mr. Pashmina got me my engagement ring. Now I wanted more!

My engagement ring is beautiful, but it isn’t the most comfortable ring to wear because it is a little thick. I assume one reason is because they need to fit the diamonds in the band, but if I put all my fingers together you can feel the metal ring and it feels weird. I wanted a wedding ring that when worn would feel like wearing nothing at all. But this wasn’t going to be easy, I didn’t want a plain metal band like Mr. Pash. I wanted something that sparkled like my e-ring.

I could go a few different ways. I could try to find a matching a matching band, or look for a very thin ring that would “go”, or get an eternity band.

I did want sparkles, but maybe not all over. I quickly realized how expensive eternity rings were. Was it worth it? I hated twisting my e-ring so all the diamonds were perfectly symmetrical. But was it worth the extra bucks not to turn a ring? If I wore it with my e-ring with it then I would still be turning a ring on finger? So was the purpose behind getting an eternity band purposeless? To me, right now in my life, an eternity band wasn’t that necessary. A three-sided ring would be more than enough. Since I would most likely be wearing the two together–I imagine 90% of the time–I might as well have them both requiring a twist.

After looking at the collection I knew that I wanted one that was similar to my engagement ring. When I put on rings of different styles–which in theory I love–it just seemed to busy, too much going on, not quite right. I knew for something that I was going to wear everyday it needed to be–in my mind–clean, versatile, and something I felt went with everything. So that left me with trying to find a match.

To my surprise there were lots of “matches” to my e-ring. The jeweler showed me all the sizes of wedding bands that were the exact same one as my engagement ring without the center diamond. There were larger, thicker versions and smaller, thinner ones. I gravitated to the smaller one after trying it on, putting my fingers together and not feeling much metal-hand contact. But then jeweler showed me how when placed together there is a “step” between the rings, basically it would create a mini-pyramid effect. They were perfectly aligned, one wasn’t thicker than the other. Then the jeweler showed me the “perfect pair” to the engagement ring I love so much. It really did look good…but it was more expensive. As if reading my groom spoke up and said under your breath, “you might as well get the one that matches it perfectly.”

They had a three hundred dollar price difference, of course the one I wanted, my match was the more expensive one. Then I got schooled by Mr. P, “don’t be cheap on this, not this time.  It matches perfectly, you should get what you want.” I instantaneously heard his voice of reason. The perfect match really was the ring I really wanted. Might as well splurge this time, especially since it wasn’t a huge price difference…better than buying a totally new ring down the road.

In a matter of just 20 minutes I picked out my ring. It really wasn’t very difficult at all. Finally!

Check out a picture of mine and his! Cute, no?! His choice? A titanium comfort fit 8 mm ring with a brushed and satin finish. Mine? A channel set diamond set band with alternating round and rectangular stones.

Did you opt for a the match of your engagement ring? Do you wear your wedding ring solo or do you stack them? Did you “splurge” on the band you really wanted?

*all images personal photos



Rings for Men

Titanium from Zales

“something hard so it doesn’t get lots of scratches”

“nothing frilly or with too much decoration”

“nothing with diamonds”

“something really light so I won’t feel it on”

These were the requirements of Mr. Pashmina as we went on our search to find the perfect men’s ring. Just to give you a little insight into the type of guy my husband is: he has “going out” sweats, “at home” sweats, and “exercise” sweats. Did you think there was just one kind? Oh, no! When he does dress up he will wear a button down flannel shirt with broken in jeans.  This is his dressy look. He does have to wear a shirt and tie to work but he hates how stuffy it feels. He often leaves his tie off until the very moment he arrives to work. Then he will proceed to roll up his sleeves.

His type?  The Casual Man.

So it is no wonder that he wanted an effortless ring. Something simple, light, and streamlined.

A few months before our wedding we hit the Route 4 section of New Jersey known as Jewelry Row. After stating the above requirements to the jeweler, we were told that the rings we would be interested in looking at were Titanium, Tungsten, Platinum, Palladium, and Stainless Steel. All these rings would are light and would hold up better from scratches than gold.

Tugnsten from Zales

First we looked at Titanium.
The pros:
1. It is a common metal, so it is inexpensive
2. Lightweight
3. Strong metal and so resistant to scratches
4.  Hypoallergenic
5. Doesn’t tarnish in salt water

The cons:
1. It can’t get resized so if his finger change over the years he would need to get a new ring
2. Although it is a hard metal, it still may get dings and abrasions

Next, we browsed at Tungsten rings. We weren’t familiar with the metal so the jewelry explained a bit about it.
The pros:
1. 3 times stronger than Titanium
2. It hardly will ever lose its shine
3. It can’t be resized
4. Not a precious metal

The cons:
1. It is heavy–heavier than Titanium
2. It can’t be engraved
3. It can tarnish in salt water

Note: There is something called Black Tungsten which is a black metal, which will appeal to some guys.

Platinum from Zales

Then we turned to Platinum. Many of these included diamonds or decorations but there were a few that were a bit more basic bands.

The pros:
1. It is more durable than gold
2. It has a true white/silver color
3. It is hypoallergenic
4. It is a precious metal
5. It can be engraved

The cons:
1. It is expensive
2. It scratches decently easily

Stainless Steel from Zales

Then we looked at Stainless Steel rings. Many of these were less formal looking, with fun details.

The pros:
1. Inexpensive
2. Tarnish-free and easy to clean
3. True silver color
4. Strong metal

The cons:
1. Can contain nickle so can irritate skin
2. Not a precious metal


The pros:
1. In the Platinum family of metals so similar properties
2. Lighter in weight than platinum
3. Precious metal
4. Hypoallergenic
5. A little cheaper than Platinum
6. A little more durable than Platinum

Palladium from Blue Nile

The cons:
1. Expensive
2. Not as many rings are made from it, so less style options

Note: It often is a lighter white silver shade than Platinum.

Immediately, the hubby gravitated to Titanium. His reasoning, “If it is good enough for the space shuttle then it is good enough for me!”

Mr. Pashmina wanted a plain band, very simple and traditional looking but after looking at the Titanium selection it wasn’t that easy. He didn’t want too much detailing, but there were a lot rings that had just a little bit…which he liked. The questions then turned to do you want a rounded or squared edge? What about finish. Matte? Brushed? Satin? Polished? Or even striped by combining two metals together or cutting a ribbon into the band? How thick do you want the ring to be? Skinny, wide or somewhere in between.

Our jeweler was very helpful. After listening to how Mr. Pashmina described his perfect ring, the jeweler brought out his ordering book and flipped to exactly what he just detailed.

So what band did he end up with? Wait for next post to see!

What type of metal do you like most? Does your man want a simple band or one with more decorations? These rings were some that appealed to my “casual guy.”

Tungsten & Wood
David Yurman
David Yurman "Rino"
David Yurman

Scott Kay
David Yurman



My Ring

The Engagement Ring

Ain’t she a beauty?! She was a surprise, but the look of her wasn’t a huge surprise. For about six months before Mr. Cali Girl popped the question he asked me to go online and show him pictures of what types of rings I liked. I came down to five that I really liked.

1.) The Tiffany Novo: A cushion diamond (like a pillow) with a bunch of smaller stones around it. Almost vintage looking, but very fresh.

2.) The Etoile: A bezel set diamond. Low set, it would never snag on anything! Very simple and unpretentious.

3.) Round Brilliant with Channel Set: A classic singular diamond with a bunch of smaller ones spaced apart on the band.

4.) Round Brilliant with Bead Set: A classic singular diamond with a bunch of smaller diamonds on the band fit snuggly close together.

5.) The Elsa Peretti Curved Band: A Modern bent ring with a small diamond stone.

What I got?

#4! It is a little bit different because on the band it alternates round and rectangular stones. Mr. Cali Girl has great taste. It is classic round engagement right, but has a little bit extra sparkle.

Which one is your favorite, Boho Brides?