We are having an untraditional Filipino wedding. Untraditional in the sense that we are not having a huge 500 person wedding!! We are not inviting all the aunties and uncles (that are somehow related but I’m not quite sure how). I read some where that the tradition of a huge wedding is due to the legacy of the entire village celebrating the bride and groom’s union. This is a wonderful thing but in this economic recession–not feasible!
My fiance, who is the Filipino one, never wanted a large wedding. He didn’t really want it to be a huge ordeal. Just a natural evolution of our relationship. I didn’t even imagine this or think it was something to be considered because my family is so small. I think the largest party my family has ever thrown had about 40 people! My uncles and aunts are not married, and I have no cousins. I have never attended a marriage in my own family!
My fiance and I decided that 100 people would be our absolute max. Anything more we would be uncomfortable. Really we hope that the turn out would be more like 75. But 100 would be our cap. This was how we initially decided on our wedding size.
But the closer and closer the wedding gets the more I have to explain why Auntie X or Uncle Z isn’t invited. I say “We are only inviting immediate family.” Or I try to divert the blame, “It’s not up to me, Mr. Cali Girl is in charge of his guests. If he thinks we should invite them then I will add them to the guest list” But I hate this. I don’t want to burn any bridges, I don’t know the ties of all his family’s relationships. I wish I wouldn’t have to be faced with this.
I wish I could have just had that 500 person event in a huge hall so I wouldn’t have to deal with it. I am a softie! I love people. But in reality my venue only fits 120 (and this would be with no dance floor). So reality is we WILL have a small wedding. Well, a small one for his family and a LARGE one for mine!
How did you decide on your wedding guest list size? Economics? Family size? Comfort level?