Deciding On a Guest List

My new extended family (circa 1985) * personal photo

My fiance, a second generation Filipino, has a lot more family members than me. A LOT more than me! All of my uncles and aunts do not have children. None of them are even married. I have no immediate cousins. I have one sister. She has one son. In my The Knot wedding guest tracker “The Bride’s Family” is only 14 guests. And this is when everyone who is single brings a date! In short, I have always wanted a huge extended family–now I will be getting one!

So it wasn’t so hard getting my guest list together. However, when you have a large family it is a bit trickier. Not so much his nuclear family (he is one of three)–it is hard to invite some people and not others.

How do you decide who comes and who stays? Well, for us, it is based on a.) budget, b.) relationship, and c.) space. We decided to invite his parents siblings (his aunts and uncles) and their children but no one beyond that. No second cousins or else it would be too huge.

Our venue fits 100 people, and originally we were aiming for 75. Right now our guest list is at 121. We haven’t yet sent out our invitations and I am sure when we start sending them out we will think of people we forgot about!

So brides, how did you decide on your guest list? Was it a hard decision?


One thought on “Deciding On a Guest List

  1. We have the same problem, except that my extended family is huge and close-knit and his is small and pretty much not involved in his life. Unfortunately, the close-knit part means that it would be really hard to invite some and not others. The fact that I’ll be in medical school (and have a negative annual income) during the wedding helped us decide to not invite any of them. We’ll be having a tiny immediate family and best friends only ceremony in his hometown, followed by an informal reception with all of the above, plus some of his good friends from his hometown.

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